Keeping in mind that I’ve by no means covered every topic, here’s what I’ve learned about being a good cis partner to trans people I date. Recognize that your partner’s identity may change over time This is important to keep in mind even if you’re dating a cis person, because anyone can discover something new about their gender identity.
I’m dating a cis woman whose partner of nearly a year identified as a cis man for most of their relationship.
He has also told me that he would prefer to have been born in a female body, but he hasn't made up his mind yet whether he would ever want to transition.
I've told him that whatever he decides, I want to be there to support him.
He tells me that he prefers gender neutral pronouns, but that he's used to being referred to as male, and is not offended when that happens.14 August 2011 So maybe you're attracted to people outside of the gender binary.Maybe you're wondering how you go about loving a person who categorizes themself as genderqueer, gender non-conforming, transgender, transmasculine or transfeminine, agender, androgynous, bigendered, or perhaps no category at all.It wasn’t my transition that was the problem – it was my partner’s lack of understanding and empathy for what I was going through.Rejecting our transition is rejecting who we are on a deep and essential level, and the pain that comes with that can be agonizing.But respecting your partner’s changing identity is key to maintaining a healthy relationship, and my girlfriend has been learning to embrace her partner’s feminine identity as it develops alongside their masculine identity. Correct people who misgender your partner I run into this issue a lot, because my partner uses they/their/them pronouns, and many people are not familiar with using the singular they as a gender-neutral pronoun for people they know. I talk about my partner with the correct pronouns, but most everyone knows I’m queer and automatically uses “she” to refer to them because they think I only date female-identified people.