Every time I date a nice guy, especially if I like him, I feel so insecure and wonder, what if he’s dating someone else at the same time?
Just last month, I met a cute guy and we went out and had so much fun together. Now it’s been a month and we’ve gone out four times.
At worst, you are setting yourself up for heartbreak, getting attached to a person who refuses to focus on you. While he’s out with you having coffee, his mind could be on the dinner he had with her last night. I know many people think, It’s okay if he’s dating others besides me.
But here’s the thing: We have so much fun together. My best friend tells me to relax – this is just how dating is. I’m going nuts thinking about him dating other girls. However, despite the apparent benefits, the Tinder Revolution often leaves us feeling less self-confident, confused, frustrated, and empty. Everybody wants to feel special and to be treated with love and respect.
She says it’s 100% normal for us to both date multiple people at once until we decide together to make the relationship exclusive. Agreeing to date someone while he or she dates other people signals that it is somehow acceptable not to respect or value you.
Of my friends who entered into relationships in the past year, every single one of them first entered a period of exclusivity before even remotely venturing into "boyfriend/girlfriend" territory.
It is now expected that a couple will first hookup for a significant -- albeit unsubstantial -- period of time, only to then qualify their pseudo relationship with vague promises of monogamy.
"You're spending a lot of time together, going out on dates, meeting each other's friends, and not seeing anyone else.